Zodi’s Blog

Most Offensive Ad Campaigns Ever

Bad Men

 

You guys all know how much I love advertising. There are few other industries that allow a person the creative expression, free drugs, and chance to mess with peoples’ heads like the ad industry. While it’s good to push the envelope and make people think (as long as they’re thinking what you want them to think) it’s not ok to offend your possible customers, or you’ll lose money instead of making money. (And that’s bad.)

So as a public service to advertising students and fans alike, I thought I’d show you why these ads are all wrong….    

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Why it’s so offensive: Because this ad implies that any woman facing similar circumstances will completely lose her composure when surprised or startled with a ring. Of course any female on the planet will spread her legs quicker than Moses parted the Red Sea in order to show appreciation for an expensive gift or cash prize. Sometimes even just for a decent meal at a quality chain restaurant. But to suggest that she’d forget that she’s in a public place and thus give the nearby sommelier (or perky waitress if you’re in TGIF) the old Britney wink is downright presumptuous and rude. Surely any women worthy of such expenditure would have the class to wait for the privacy of the elevator where she would then perform top notch fellatio.    

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Why it’s so offensive: Because who the hell are they to assume how my wife and mistress compare to each other? How do they know that my wife isn’t the sexy brunette who is always giggling, and hosing herself off but who tires me out and is driving me into an early grave? Maybe I finally found someone who isn’t all that interested in ‘being young,’ ‘beautiful,’ and ‘healthy,’ or ‘personal hygiene.’ It’s nice to be able to take a freaking nap once in a while without having to have the afternoon delight, and then having to change the bed sheets because somebody was soaking wet and all oiled up again…meaning I never do get my fucking nap!!!

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Why it’s so offensive: Well when you begi…..no, forget it. This isn’t half bad at all come to think of it. It speaks rather eloquently to this ‘sports’ base audience. And if you ain’t straight, white, rascist, and a Christian they don’t want you ‘awatchin’ anyhow. And what better way to keep undesirables from applying for employment? It’s even better than the ‘Minorities Need Not Apply’ campaign they used until 2007.  

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Why it’s so offensive: First of all this ad refers to the rug lady as a ‘girl,’ which she clearly is not since she looks to be well over the age of 25. So ‘girl’ in this case is both condescending and insulting. The ad should have referred to the rug lady as a homemaker, the little women, the old hag or the ball and chain. Also they are risking offending the entire animal rights demographic with the use of the tiger rug. Why not just have the rug lady lying face down on a simple throw rug?  

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Why it’s so offensive: It has been conclusively proven by recent polling that surprisingly few women and even fewer men enjoy equating their fast food with a pink, brown or black, vein-y, pulsing penis. What I find even more offensive is the fact that the ad implies (falsely, I might add) that bigger is better when it is clearly not. Most women are more than satisfied with a four or five inch….um sandwich. I’ve been assured of this many times throughout my life.

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To learn how advertising should be done, head on over to Just Making Convo and study the material dated 4-1-09 to 4-12-10. Be sure to take plenty of notes, there may be a pop-quiz.

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April 12, 2010 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , ,

52 Comments »

  1. are we talking length or girth when it comes to four inch sandwiches?

    Comment by nursemyra | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • How weird would it be if I said both length and girth? Nevermind, I’ll just say girth.

      Thanks Nursemyra!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

  2. I love this post! Scott, sex sells. Plain and simple.

    But let me correct you on your point about a woman and her show of appreciation for a decent meal. At the risk of sounding crude, I think, as you say “any women worthy of such expenditure” can attribute this behavior to three key elements and dining at Taco Bell ain’t one of them.

    They are:
    Color, Cut, and Clarity.

    Comment by Candy | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • Sex has always sold. Even back when the snake showed Eve that image of the tan and buff Adam ‘working it like he owned it’ and got her to bite that apple. And that was on hella expensive fruit too.

      So color, cut and clarity… I’m writing this all down!

      Thanks Candy!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

  3. Your mistress/wife commentary is great, hahaha!! And the jewelry ad *could* be accurate, depending on the gift, LOL! (Just kidding…maybe, haha)

    Comment by Mrs. D | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • I thought you’d like that one. Who doesn’t just need a nap once in a while?

      I know it’s accurate, especially for long term relationships. It just saves both of you the awkwardness of making the first move. It’s like, “ok, nice gift , now we’ll have sex!”

      Thanks Mrs. D!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

  4. Scott; don’t get the NASCAR one, perhaps need to know Yanke subculture? The B+W/Dacron add must be atleast 35-40 years old, different era and rules then.

    BUT, the Burger King ad is simply gross, IMHO.

    Comment by Dave Hambidge | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • They are advertising the fact that there are no minority drivers (or fans) in the ‘sport.’ An obvious fact that doesn’t need saying. Ridiculous waste of ad dollars.

      I do love outdated adverts. I also love Mad Men, can’t wait for that to come back.

      Thanks Dave!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

  5. we have this ice cream place called Gelare here and in the cafe’s they have this one picture of a woman’s mouth open ready to take the icecream into her mouth..red shiny lips…and the the scoop mold that they use…yes…yes..it looks like a circumcised penis…so you can imagine that in the picture the woman’s mouth is about to eat the ice cream scoop..its very clever hehe i searched for the picture but i couldnt find it. ill see if i can get a photo of it one of these days and send it to you hehe.

    Comment by Susi Spice | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • Wow, your description of the ad just did something for me. I personally find ice-cream (or ice…or any frozen substance really) sexy and hot, but meat or meat like products….just gross.

      If you could find that ad and send it to me asap, I’d appreciate it. I need it for research purposes of course.

      Thanks Susi!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

      • bahahaha sure scott…”research”

        Comment by Susi Spice | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  6. “Most women are more than satisfied with a four or five inch….um sandwich. I’ve been assured of this many times throughout my life.”

    That’s complete bullshit, just FYI. 🙂

    Comment by Candice | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • Surely you can tell when I’m kidding Candice? You know I only have 3 to offer….

      Thanks Candice!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

      • well speaking from experience can i just say that when they are BIG and I mean HUGE like… – OMG there’s no way that’s gonna fit in there – huge – its not that nice… and very restrictive when you are only 5’1

        Comment by Susi Spice | April 13, 2010 | Reply

        • Well then you really would love me!!!

          Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

          • Can’t…breathe….

            Comment by bschooled | April 13, 2010 | Reply

            • lmao scott.. ok one extreme to the other isnt good either hahahaha

              Comment by Susi Spice | April 15, 2010 | Reply

              • Well ok, maybe not extremely small, but pretty small…

                Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  7. Having graduated with a degree in Advertising Journalism, I think these ads are wrong – you can push the envelope, but this goes beyond the envelope.

    In our house, if anyone is soaking wet and needs a nap, it won’t be me….I’ll be the one changing sheets. LOL

    Comment by EvilTwinsWife | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • Did you really? I never did get the degree, any degree but aside for the 2 years of marketing in college, I have been a lifelong student. It is my favorite field to work in by far.

      No these were the very worst ones I could find. They are so bad that they’re funny.

      You know, you’re the hot brunette wife in that scenario!

      Thanks Evil Twins Wife!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 12, 2010 | Reply

  8. Great point on the mistress/wife thing. It’s entirely possible that a guy is cheating on his young, smoking hot wife with a crabby bitch who belittles him and nags at him non-stop. Just for some variety, ya know. Stereotypes are bad.

    Also, “girl” is definitely wrong. I’ve found that chicks prefer “broads.” 😉

    Comment by Jay | April 12, 2010 | Reply

    • No as a married man I can tell you that you are totally right. Like I said, those young, smoking hot, sexed up, beauties will tire you out to no end.

      I really do need a nap.

      Thanks Jay!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  9. In the ZONE, my brother! Showing the ad sense that made you a playa, and making me want to carry a ring around hot women and have a sandwich ready to eat “down there”.

    Ahem. Sorry . . . carried away there. Alrighty then.

    GREAT post!!!

    Comment by Dan McGinley | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • It’s ok to get a little carried away if you’re in advertising, postal work or writing…it’s almost expected.

      Thanks Dan!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  10. Scott, i hardly know you (if by “know” we mean we sit in isolated corners of the world and vaguely interact through cyberspace), and yet still, I am surprised, how is it that you take offense to these ads?!
    The success of our society – and we are talking big success here; obliteration of other species, complete ravaging of the earth, major financial upheavals, confining poverty to the third world, all sorts of greatness – rests on holding women, like myself, firmly in their place while men remain pillars of strength and wisdom. I have never since this so *creatively* or eloquently expressed as us being rugs on the floor and having men step on our heads. Its pure genius and something only a man could think of. God bless patriarchy.

    Comment by RubyTwoShoes | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • No, I don’t personally take offence to these ads; my soul is an ice-cold, slab of marble. I only point out (through my obvious expertise of course) what other, less evolved people may find offensive. This is after all my ‘job.’

      Well who doesn’t define success by..

      Obliteration of other species; ahh, they’ll grow back.
      Ravaging the earth; she totally was asking for it. What with that dress and all.
      Poverty to the third-world; haha better them than us huh?

      It makes me so happy that you see things like I do. Maybe there’s a place in this big, bad world for a swell girl like you after all.

      Thanks Ruby Two Shoes!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  11. I think I mentioned that I’m in market research and once worked for a company owned by a larger firm that also owned several large ad agencies
    I loved going to the strategy meetings, you could feel the BS swirling as the room spinned round and round

    and behind the 2 way mirror at focus groups – fucking hilarious crap happens back there

    Comment by dianne | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • That’s one of the parts that I haven’t done (yet) but would love to do. Even from watching Mad Men I can see how much fun it would be to be behind that glass.

      Now you’ve got me thinking of you as Peggy.

      Thanks Dianne!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  12. I’m kind of surprised the NHL hasn’t been asked to diversify or at least defend their whiteness. I suppose most of those whites some more exotic with their nearly-voweless last names, but still, a majority of the teams are as white as the ice they play on.

    Maybe it’s all a different demographic. Nordic goons vs. southern rednecks. I guess I’d take the beer-swilling headpunchers any day of the week…

    Comment by Capitalist Lion Tamer | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • Well the NHL has Ty Dome. One is all it takes not to be racist right? And black people never did really like the whole winter sports thing; it’s not part of their biological makeup. It’s not part of my Italian ass either for that matter. Probly why I suck at hockey.

      But they’d be really good at driving really fast. Wouldn’t blacks and Mexicans really dominate that sport if given a chance? That must be why they can’t get in…..

      Thanks CLT!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  13. Great stuff Scott, but just a piece of Don Draperesque advise…avoid using the word veiny in your copy. 😉

    Comment by Fundamental Jelly | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • Yea, I do stay away from veiny in my copy but the rest of Don’s advice has gotten me in all types of shit. I’ve been criminally charged with everything; identity theft. DUI’s, assault, tax evasion, drug possession and smoking on an airplane.

      You gotta take his advice with a grain of salt. OH wait, you said –esque…..nevermind.

      Thanks FJ!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  14. *laughing* i have some old Good Housekeeping magazines from the 60s, that leggs ad is in one… this was hilarious scott but the last one was getting very close to the line don’cha think? 🙂

    Comment by Lynn | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • No I think the last one (as well as most of the others) are way, way over the line. I can’t believe somebody ok’d them in the first place.

      Thanks Lynn!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

      • oh no, dont get me wrong, i didnt say “over the line” i said “very close to the line”…there’s a difference. i love the gray area. 🙂

        Comment by Lynn | April 13, 2010 | Reply

        • Gray can be the funnest color, it does leave room for all sorts of …blending.

          No, personally I wouldn’t have published some of those, but that’s only because I care more about money.

          Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 14, 2010 | Reply

  15. The wife/mistress thing reminds of an old Woody Allen story called The Whore of MENSA. It was about a guy who “cheated” on his wife by paying some chick to engage in intellectual conversation with him. Good Stuff. Cheers Scott!!

    Comment by Matt-Man | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • I’ve somehow missed that one and I love most of Allen’s stuff. I’ll have to check it out.

      Thanks Matt-Man!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 13, 2010 | Reply

  16. Scott, I wish I could come up with a comment worthy of this post (seriously, nobody does this genre of schtick like you do) , but sadly, due to an evening spent with a bottle of…well, some liquid substance compliments of my hard alcohol loving friend, I can’t.

    I guess all I can really say is that “one man’s top-notch fellatio, is another woman’s “just going through the motions…””

    Comment by bschooled | April 13, 2010 | Reply

    • You know what I always used to say B; a hair of the dog will fix what ails you. Then I always ate part of the tail, then the feet, then the hindquarters….no need to go into any more lurid detail really. But I hope you are feeling better soon, I need you over here for your top-notch comments.….

      hahahaha we can always tell.

      Thanks B!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 14, 2010 | Reply

  17. It’s quite obvious truth in advertising and being offensive in advertising mean two different things. If truth were a required part of advertising, there would be very little to advertise. People want funny, obnoxious, ridiculous or semi-controversial. Truth, they want nothing to do with.

    Now myself: I want truth. I find it funnier than anything ad companies can come up with. But I’m a minority in that department, so I get the other stuff 😦

    Comment by jammer5 | April 14, 2010 | Reply

    • The truth (haha get it?) is that people don’t generally know what they want. In advertising hilarious, obnoxious, ridiculous, etc are used because they stick in peoples brains. And when you get right down to it, that’s the most important thing.

      Those ads don’t actually even lie, none of them really focus on the product either; they don’t have to.

      Thanks Jammer!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  18. I printed that BK poster out, lol.

    Comment by Heff | April 14, 2010 | Reply

    • It would go great in your game room!

      Thanks Heff!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  19. Great post Scott- Thanks for the laughs

    Comment by David | April 14, 2010 | Reply

    • Glad you laughed, that’s my only goal!

      Thanks David!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  20. Its amazing how some of these ads got published without a red alarm going off in the meetings that pass them.

    Great post, opened my eyes about certain things. Certainly, advertising is a great industry. Thanks for sharing this.

    Comment by Corve DaCosta | April 15, 2010 | Reply

    • Yea, that’s the one thing I never understood. I guess times and values are always cycling.

      It’s always been my favorite, I mean for when I actually work….

      Thanks Corve!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  21. yo,
    so i might be going to the shopping centre (mall) tonight where the Gelare place is, I am goign to try to remember to take my camera and take photo of the poster, hopefully it is still there hehe. then I will send it to you to ..um..erhmm.. to enjoy

    Comment by Susi Spice | April 15, 2010 | Reply

    • Oh, that would be awesome Susi! It’s for research tho. Send me any other photos that you think I might research as well. I’m always open to more research!

      Thanks Susi!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 15, 2010 | Reply

  22. What can I say? Nice post.

    Comment by Ramblin' Rooster | April 19, 2010 | Reply

    • You’ve said it all.

      Thanks Rooster!!

      Comment by Scott Oglesby | April 19, 2010 | Reply


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